The Misery of the Envious
By Sr. Rocío, S.H.M.
A short time ago, our eyes were struck and we were overwhelmed by the images of destruction and death which were caused by the tsunami in various places of Asia. There are, however, other types of interior tsunamis, spiritual tsunamis, of whose presence we barely realize the importance because their effects are not so visible, but they are just as destructive. One of these spiritual tsunamis is the envy that entraps the soul and produces hatred, destruction and death everywhere. Sacred Scripture warns us, “By the envy of the devil, death came into the world.” (Wis. 2:24)
How many times have we not felt grow in our interior that monster which is the feeling of envy of our neighbor! Envy of a good thing that the other person has done and that I have not done, envy of an action that is approved and applauded by others, envy of a natural or supernatural gift that someone else has received, envy because they praise the other person and not me…so many things that are often small, of minimal importance, but that so easily awake within us that sin which we call envy.
It can frequently be very subtle, without us realizing it. We almost don’t recognize it, but it is there, raising itself like a wall between my neighbor and myself. Other times it presents itself with all its virulence, demolishing the soul and killing every good thought that begins to spring forth.
What is envy in reality? It is a sadness and vexation that is produced in me as a result of the good of others. I consider and judge that good as an evil for myself, as an enemy. In a way, it seems that my glory and the praise I believe they should give me and that I would like to receive is diminished. I think that the other person is taking part of the merit which would be mine if he did not exist. Envy is that contentment that I feel when I find out that something bad has happened to my brother. It is that weight that I feel when I hear of his prosperities. It is the meditated silence when I hear of the good qualities of my neighbor. It is the curiosity to investigate and discover the defects of others in order to publish them or to rejoice in them. It is that cunning skill at displacing others and taking prestige away from their works.
We should never forget that envy is a capital sin and that, as such, it is a source of other vices and sins. It therefore causes great damage in the soul. It is simply a form or manifestation of the many branches that selfishness has. It makes us insensible to the good of our neighbor. We are too full of ourselves. Man is always inclined to seek his own interest, with harshness and in detriment of his neighbor. “Step down so that I can stand up there.” It is the vice characteristic of stingy and narrow hearts, that damages the one who envies more than the one envied. “Envy is a purely malicious vice. It brings no utility or pleasure to the one who has it. On the contrary, it fills him with torment.” (St. Thomas of Villanueva)
It is not simply a desire of emulation that could be good because it leads us to desire the goods others possess and that we lack in an orderly way. Nor can it be confused with the displeasure or annoyance that we can be caused when an unmerited honor is granted someone whom we positively know not to be worthy of such, either because his action was not worthy of it or because he could use this honor in a bad way. When we speak about envy, we speak more about the judgement that proceeds from pride. In reality, we believe that we are better than the other and we think that we should receive praise with a higher title than our brother. We believe that we have more qualities and gifts than the other person and that, therefore, we should be recognized. Sometimes our pride can reach the point that, even while seeing very clearly that the other person has done something better or has more gifts, we cannot bear for him to be recognized and praised and we seek the way to direct those praises towards ourself. “Let us have no self-conceit, no provoking of one another, no envy of one another.” (Gal. 5:26)
It is easier for one to be envious of someone who is more or less at the same level as he. This is because normally man feels overshadowed in his vanity by the honor and good of people who are at his same level and not of those who clearly surpass him and against whom he knows he cannot compete.
The effects of envy in the soul are tremendous. It produces, as we have said, a great sadness. The envious person is destined to live in unhappiness. He is never happy. He is not capable of rejoicing in the others’ goods. He is not capable of rejoicing in the simple things of life because he always judges them as an enemy of his own joy. What he considers to be an enemy of his joy is precisely what is causing this great sadness. The envious person loses his joy upon facing many goods that could gladden him and he mistakenly perceives the successes of others as an evil. If others praise him for something, he will always try to discover some hidden reason, some intention behind this praise. Normally we project our own thoughts and desires to the minds of others and in this way the envious person is not capable of praising someone disinterestedly. He thinks that all men act in the same way. He can even reach the point where he feels a certain complacency upon hearing of some disgrace that has occurred to his brother or reach the point of rejoicing only in the adversity of a neighbour that will make his own success stand out. What great quantities of stinginess can the envious heart possess!
Envy causes division. The envious person is not capable of loving his neighbor, due to the fact that he loves himself excessively in a disordered fashion. In short, it is the choice that man must take: either God or myself. It is the choice between the love for God and my neighbor and self-love, taken to the point of despising God. And when I choose to love myself in a disordered way above God and my neighbor, this love is easily transformed into hatred. The envious person perceives his neighbor as an enemy. He is annoyed when he finds people who are better than he, who have more intelligence, more holiness, more apostolic fruits, higher positions, who are more recongized... thinking that in this way his own value is diminished.
Hatred is easily generated. It leads one to procure the dishonor of his neighbor through gossip, calumny, insults, reserve while praising, etc. How difficult it is for an envious person to praise something that his brother has done! First envy creeps in, as a small interior thought. Then interior gossips and insults will be admitted into the heart, from which comes forth good and bad desires, “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” (Mt. 12:34) It is a truly destructive sentiment that is grudged within. It eats one up. As Scripture very correctly says, “Envy is the rottenness of the bones.” (Prov. 14:30)
The step from the interior to the exterior is now very easy, barely perceptible. As soon as the opportunity arrives, he will take advantage to dishonor his neighbor. Even here our self-love can lead us to deceive ourselves, because many times it is not a direct dishonor. On the contrary, we begin with a praise, after which we subtly open fire with all our artillery so that that action, which we unavoidably have to recognize, remain as unnoticed and concealed as possible: it is easy for her because she has that gift, it doesn’t have so much merit as in this other person, you know, in reality, there are a lot of people who do the same or even better, I’m sure I would have done the same thing in those circumstances, etc... It could even lead to desiring the death of the other person, in the measure in which he overshadows my desires and ambitions. Let us not forget that it was precisely out of envy that Cain killed his brother Abel.
The envious person does not know what the word friendship means. He experiences his neighbor as a competitor or as a threat, which is a common reaction. When I do not trust much in my own capacities, I have a desire to show others and myself what I can do. In spite of everything, I am worth something. It is relatively frequent that this competitive tendency makes us see others as rivals. This can lead us to a tragic situation: when someone is praised in my presence, due to the poor opinion that I have of myself, I feel attacked. In fact, there are no motives for this reaction, but I deform the reality by constantly comparing myself with that person. All this makes me distrustful and even aggressive. It makes me constantly defend myself.
One might ask, faced with this situation, this tendency, what can be done? There is only one way: charity and humility. A short while ago, I saw a movie on the life of John Paul II in which this sentence was constantly said: only love conquers hate. However, if evil and hate are not conquered by true love, then another hate, even greater, will come to substitute it. And it is true, we can only conquer envy with charity. When you truly love someone, you never envy him. On the contrary, you rejoice in his successes and charity leads you to love his good as if it were your own. The good soul sees everything with eyes of goodness. Charity is justice and knows how to recognize what corresponds to each person without stealing or taking for himself the honor which belongs to his neighbor.
Charity opens; envy closes. Charity maintains the ideal; envy withers it. Charity sharpens the conscience and tautens the will, directing it towards other goals. Charity is restless, dynamic, apostolic; envy is only capable of thinking of onself and holding grudges in one's heart, provoking uneasiness, bitterness, disorder and unhappiness. “Take away your envy and what I have will be yours. Take away my envy and what you possess will be mine. Envy separates; charity unites.” (St. Augustine)
And on the other hand, humility. The one who is humble knows his limitations and rejoices in seeing himself surrounded by people who surpass him in many aspects. In addition, he doesn’t care. Rather, he desires that others be and do more than he, not wishing to make himself indispensable or insuperable.
When we reach the point where we can sincerely say, like Cardinal Merry del Val: may others be chosen and I set aside, may others be praised and I go unnoticed, may others become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should; then, and only then will we have conquered and exiled envy from our heart.
