Spiritual Alzheimer´s
By Kelly Pezo
My grandparents have been married now for almost fifty-three years. Like any marriage, they have had rough spots and tribulations. There have also been moments of immense joy and love. My grandmother is an amazing wife, mother and grandmother; always concerned for everyone’s well being. With my grandfather she has been too good! You might say that she spoils him! She does do anything for him. But all ten children and all twenty-seven grandchildren agree that they are a beautiful sight to behold, so many years and still so in love.
A few years ago my grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. It is a progressive and hereditary disease; most of his siblings have already completely lost their minds. Every once in a while he forgets the names of the grandkids or asks, “Whose are you?” And we just smile and say, “I’m Gisela’s” or “I’m Javier’s.” And you just have to keep smiling even after the fifth time he asks.
Lately things have been getting worse, but he has always remembered my grandmother. My grandmother, by the grace of God, has had so much serenity and love. She is sanctifying herself in dealing patiently with his hallucinations, forgetfulness, paranoia, day-long trips to the doctor and all the things that go along with being the wife of an elderly man with Alzheimer’s disease.
Last week my grandmother called my mother crying and told her something that had happened. My grandfather woke up that morning and he did not recognize my grandmother. He failed to know who she was and he refused to believe her when she told him that she was his wife. He demanded proof. So she took out pictures from their fiftieth wedding anniversary celebration and showed them all to him with tears in her eyes. He watched her and he looked at the pictures and he began to realize that she was telling the truth and that it was her, his devoted wife of almost 53 years. He immediately started crying and asking her for forgiveness, and they cried together.
How many times, Lord, are we like that with you?
So quickly we forget all that He has done for us. We do not feel the Lord’s presence and when things start to get harder and it is more difficult to love Him, we ask, “Who are you? I don’t know who you are! Prove it to me!” And He looks at us with a gaze of inexhaustible love and says, “How could you forget me?” Then we begin to think and to reflect on our lives and all the graces we have received and recall how He has been ever present in the good times and in the not so good times. We break down and cry. We cry tears like those of St. Peter after 3 times denying Christ, tears of contrition for having been unfaithful. But our Lord is faithful, for He cannot deny Himself (2 Tim. 2:13.) And although there is no cure for Alzheimer’s, our Lord has given us a remedy for spiritual Alzheimer’s: a place at the foot of the Cross next to the ever-faithful Virgin, who is always interceding for her poor children.
Dearest Mother, health of the sick, teach us to be faithful.
