"He is Alive"
I was a cradle Catholic, that is, I went to a Catholic school from first to seventh grade and got confirmed, but we never lived our faith at home. Unfortunately, like so many others, I left the Church and followed my own path. When I came to realize that something was missing in me I started going to different Churches, Pentecostal, Baptist... but I didn’t feel anything, so I left going anywhere. But God had His hand placed over me all the time. He led me to my path after many years of errors and sufferings, and I think God led me round a longer way because He wanted to show me certain things, to prepare me for the impact He was going to provoke in my life. Maybe it was so that I would then be more compassionate with others and be able to say to them, " I know what you are going through, I’ve been there and there is hope, He is ALIVE!"
I started doing homeschooling and they advised me to go to a Catholic Homeschool Group. I had been a member for a year, but I still found it hard to connect with the other mothers. Until one day, when I felt worse than ever, God put a person in front of me who said a few words that changed my life for ever: I was stressed and depressed, and one of the mothers I had recently met asked me how I was. She said it with such compassion-it wasn’t just a greeting- she really wanted to know how I was! I told her that I thought I needed some kind of relaxing yoga exercises or something similar because I simply didn’t know how to live with the problems I had. This friend very kindly said, "I know something a hundred times better, do you know what adoration is?" I had seen it announced in the Parish newsletter but I didn’t really know what it was even though I considered myself a Catholic. This friend went on to tell me about what we know is the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist- that miracle which takes place before our eyes in Mass when the priest consecrates the bread and wine! I knew I should have learned this at school, but for some reason or other, I felt this was the first time somebody spoke to me about this! She suggested that I go before the Blessed Sacrament and simply sit down. "Don’t do anything!" she said, " Just sit there." I still didn’t understand, but I thought , "well, some time in silence might be what I need!".
It was really early Saturday morning. When I walked to church I got a book, " An hour with Jesus." I walked into the Chapel while the morning light filtered through the stained glass. The air was full of the Holy Spirit. I thought that it was strange that I felt my feet as if they were walking through half a meter of mud. The chapel was full of people, but everything was so silent that you could hear a penny fall on the floor. I knelt before the Blessed Sacrament on the altar and then sat down with the book. This book led me to a conversation with Jesus and to a meditation, such a profound meditation that an hour and a half went by as if it were ten minutes! I looked down and saw that my shirt was soaked with tears, I had been crying while reading. At that moment I noticed that the rest of the people were also crying, just as if they were experiencing the same thing! I looked up at the monstrance and instantly felt comforted. A great force, something which can only be described as pure and complete Love, came to me. It’s a feeling which can’t be put into words and a moment I’ll never forget. I don’t know how I got into my car. I can only remember driving home as if I were in another world, trying to analise this supernatural experience which had just happened to me.
When I got home I called my husband and asked him to sit down. "GOD IS REAL!" I told him, "You know how you sometimes see christian people walking around with surprised looks on their faces???Now I understand why!!!! There is a whole supernatural world, which we don’t realize exists!!!!". 
From that day I’ve hungered for God. I devour books about the Eucharist and the Early Church, the saints and the Holy Scriptures. The Lord changed me that day and I’ll never be the same. Two years after this experience, on Corpus Christi, the Lord gave me the same astonishing experience as the Corpus Procession went by. Without really wanting to, I fell on my knees in deep admiration of Him and I again experienced the same flow of water coming from my eyes, which I learned was called the gift of tears. I haven’t had that experience again, but I know I’ve been blessed by the Lord without measure! And I think that God has opened my eyes so that I can share my experience!
Jesus said," I’ll never leave you." What a blessing from the Lord is the Church! The Gift of His presence- Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity- He is alive and is here with us! If everyone knew this they would break the doors of the Church to come and be present for this miracle during the sacrifice of the Mass!
My friend told me that on that day she had been fighting with whether to tell me the Good News or not, because we scarcely knew each other. How courageous it was of her to have taken this step and to have been open to the Holy Spirit! And what about you? Do not be afraid! You never know when your testimony, whether it be your smallest words or actions, can have a tremendous effect upon someone. With God’s grace we might become His instruments and help Him win hearts and save souls!
©HM Magazine No.132 - September/October 2006
